I pulled in some favours from the family and got hold of some neck parma, some salami, and some panchetta for pizza night. Actually, I can’t verify any of those ingredients, it was so long ago, but I’m pretty sure we had salami. We had cheese, I know that much. The white stuff, the buffalo cheese, or danger cheese, as it’s known in milking circles.

Gilla was my Ben Kenobi, coaching me, encouraging me, as I kneaded the door and applied the toppings. There was as air of imminent disaster like a demons possessed shadow, closing in the room as the oven heated.

I told stories about cutting edge sexual deviancy and experimental adult video making, and then once every nanna in the room had turned a ghostly white, we sat down to 4 pizzas.

Then I bid the nans adieu, and they went home to have horrific nightmares about extreme penile pee-pee hole enlargement, and German schizen “cinema.”

We all had the nightmares. We all still do. In time, the sun will rise again.