CB (1), GF (MOM), CG, JH, RH, TH, TW, AW, DC
Be more than you can be.
That’s as good a code as you can get, and it’s the code the Nans played by and lived by last Thursdey night. Our opponents were a brutish mob of savage hairy sasquatch. There skin was slimey like like they’d just been coughed up by a giant cat, a sick one. Or maybe they’d just been birthed by an alien. An alien who wanted so badly to beat the Nans, that it had worked out a way to birth hairy formidable sasquatch that could barely pass as humans, that had been sent here on a seek and destroy mission.
Well, that wasn’t going to happen. Not on our watch. We’re human beings goddamit! No hairy fuckin sasquatch alien is going to take our field of play and slop and plop their sticky mucus all over it, and get away with it.
So we showed em.
The alien freakazoids were heading the ball so much we couldn’t touch it.
When they stuck at goal, it was like canonballs coming.
Their slime burned our skin like battery acid. They sucked, and they sucked hard.
But the nannas were not perturbed.
Chassie let out about 20 kg’s of pure panache with a stunning goal from beyond the half.
Tao fought back too. He fought hard enough to hit lillac on the purpleometer. Not a bad effort, but a big part of me wanted him to kill every one of their guys, particularly the douche bag who pushed him down while muttering something in Greedo language that noone understood.
Half time is a blur. I never really know what the hell’s going on by half time. I feel like Maverick after Goose has just died, and Mav is having a lot of trouble re-engaging, but then Viper makes it clear he’s got Mav’s back, and Mav balls magically pop back out of his vagina, and he kills Russia. While the pep talk is happening, inside I’m just saying “Talk to me Goose” over and over. But don’t tell anyone that.
Second half was insane.
Frase’ pulled a new time stop move. Here’s how it went down. Hinkley slinkerly wafted the ball to Fraser in the D, and then Fraser droped the time bomb braining on the sasquatches, leaving them stunned for a good 5 seconds. Fraser repositioned his shorts, pulled a shit eating grin in the direction of the Nanna subs, and positioned the ball so that it would go in. Just as the alien brutuses began to unfreeze from their groggy haze, Ghee rolled one home.
In that moment, before the screams of ecstacy from Gilla, before the classy nod of kudos from the Captain, in that moment, cancer was cured, drugs were legal, poverty was wiped out, and love ruled supreme.
Maybe the aliens won, maybe they didn’t. Didn’t matter.